Transformations

Thanks to everyone who's emailed or called to see why it's been so long since I last posted... Frankly, when I have free time, I can find a million other things to do! I finally sent pictures to grandparents and other family, and thought I'd write a quick post.

Where to begin?? The last 6 weeks have been jam-packed with the typical ups and downs of family life as well as milestones and struggles more specific to adoption. I'll hit the highlights just to catch you up.

Micah is doing GREAT finally! He has really turned a corner emotionally as far as coping with the changes from having a new sister. He is even choosing to share with Brenna and initiates making sure she has toys to play with. He has learned to ride his tricycle on his own--so exciting! :) He loves to paint and does so at least every day. He also loves to pretend and daily re-arranges all the chairs in our dining room/den to make a bus/train/airplane/boat/tree-truck/pick-up truck--you get the picture. He has already dressed up as a train engineer for Halloween. Chris took him to this local event at our zoo and he so did not get what was happening. We never talk about Halloween, so he was clueless. After going through the primate house where there was trick-or-treating, he came to understand that candy was involved and was so excited! He's had a terrible sinus infection but seems to finally be getting better. One of my favorite recent Micah memories is the day he told me that I was his best friend! He is so loving and often grabs my face, looks me in the eyes, and says "you're a good mommy." AWW!!

Brenna is doing well. She had a terrible tummy problem for 3 days--unbelievable diarrhea!! She had an ear-infection at the same time. We're so thankful she's better. Right before she got sick she was weighed and is up to 19.4 pounds!! She's gained 8 pounds in the last 3.5 months--almost as much as what she gained her entire life before. We're so humbled and grateful that she's doing so well! She's still not crawling, but is showing more strength and interest. I have physical therapy exercises I have to do with her; she hates them sometimes, but I'm learning how to make them more endurable for her. She's a fighter! She continues to amaze us with her playfulness and openness to learning so many new things. She's really into language right now and often turns our heads toward her to repeat a word she finds interesting or funny. The BIG news is that about 3/4 weeks ago, she said Ma-Ma for the first time! Then, a couple weeks ago, she started saying Da-Da. Now she says those two words and duck, uh-oh, and boo. She still signs all the time and we think she's a very smart little girl. She loves to swing and both kids LOVE to bump around in the yard in the wagon. She now reaches for us to hold her all the time and gets upset when we leave the room or the house--huge emotional progress! Again, we're so thankful she's doing so well!

As for Chris and I, we sometimes dream of going away for a weekend to Tahiti or even a local motel for that matter! But, at the same time, we are so thankful and filled with joy to have been given the privilege of parenting these two amazing kids. Recently a dear mentor told me some life-giving words as I related my struggles with letting go of my kids and entrusting them to God. She told me that we can give all to our kids and leave very little for ourselves and it still will not be enough for them. They have needs that can only be met by God; in fact, in our shortcomings as parents, they can experience God's strength even more. God will never let me down as a parent--HE will always be there for my kids. So, the best I can do for them is to give and love unconditionally but also model wholeness as a woman of God. That means taking time away from them when I need to, exercising to stay physically/mentally healthy, going to bible study, hanging out with friends, and dating my husband! Such words of life and freedom--I needed to hear them. I so often think that I can do it all and be all for my kids and when I (obviously) can't, I judge myself and feel guilty. If I can just learn that I can never give them all they need, I can find peace! The best thing I can give them is a life lived for God.